The last thing I want to do

If I am honest, I am scared right now. Scared and excited.

In the past four years God has taken us from "christians" to having a deep desire to follow Jesus. From a broken and corrupt marriage to a beautiful picture of grace and forgiveness. To being selfish and consumed by the American dream to becoming parents and becoming passionate for the orphan.

In November we will be venturing to the beautiful country of Ethiopia for ten days to serve orphans, lepers, and the extremely poverty stricken people of Korah. When I started looking to adopt God put this wonderful country on my heart and since then it has become a love of mine and I feel so blessed to be able to have the chance to go and experience the life changing things God has planned for us there.

Ten days is not long. But it is long enough to touch a life and most importantly have our lives touched by God's wonderful love and plan for us. I am scared of that plan. A few months ago we were praying for two sweet girls in Ethiopia who I thought maybe God wanted us to bring home to be our daughters. It became a constant strain as wondered why God wasn't answering. I mean wouldn't he want those princesses to be ours? If he was here wouldn't he have taken them home to be his? So why weren't we receiving an answer? But then I realized I had. Be still.

I have written a few posts about this because it has been so heavy on my heart. How do you wait and be still for something that would change your life so dramatically? How do you be still when you need to plan and raise money? How do you focus on the rest of your life when something so big is constantly hanging over your head? It has been a constant struggle of mine.

Then two months ago I found out about a friend of mine who was taking her sweet little family to discipleship school to get training to minister better to people. A cord was struck in my heart. The Lord spoke to me. "Don't you remember all those years ago when you and King Los said you would go in ministry into another country? Why not now? What is stopping you? Didn't I sell your house and now you have no debt?".  Since then things have become a whirl wind. We have been praying and seeking God's will knowing again he is saying BE STILL. I know he will reveal his will but it is so hard for me to do that. I want to know. I want to plan. I want to pray and say my goodbyes. I want to pack and sell. But the last thing I want to do is be still.


Our prayer is that this trip would help us to see more clearly the plan God has for us. Would you pray with us? Would you pray God's will is revealed? Would you pray that we can raise the funds? Most important would you pray I can be still?